the past doesn't exist

In reality our existence is composed of endless consecutive Now moments, one after the other, and another, and another. We always exist in the Now, although our minds may be all over the place, spending a lot of time in the past and in the future. But the past does not exist, nor does the future. The past is just an accumulation of memories that live in our mind, while the future is something we are creating right now in the Now, but that has not happened yet. The past was Now at one time, but now that it's gone it's only a memory and no longer real.

In our minds we keep thinking about experiences from the past and projecting them into the future, creating fears and worries. We anticipate and expect that unpleasant experiences from the past will be repeating themselves in the future (and the more we do, the more they may). So then we worry about the future, and strategize and plan to avoid that projection from happening. Hence, we live in our minds, which live in the past and in the future - which both don't exist. Crazy, right?

If we simply lived entirely in the moment, in the Now, and left that non-existant past, and that not-yet-created future alone, there would be no need for fears and worries. How great is that? Think about it.

you do have a choice

               Oftentimes we don't realize that we have a choice, we simply react and do, because we are on autopilot. But we do. We have a choice of how to react to someone or to something. I was in a meditation class last night and another attendee explained how potholes make him very angry, and how they trigger the same reaction in him every time.  He gets so mad at the authorities for not doing anything about springtime holes in the road. It is quite liberating to realize that you have a choice of how to react. You could of course become angry every time you encounter a pothole, but that becomes silly after a while, and it's not of much use. You upset yourself and the pothole doesn't improve. You could call up the authorities and make them aware of a particularly large and deep pothole that endangers other drivers as well (I did that a few years back and they actually filled the pothole in question pretty quickly). That is empowering - but you can't call up about every pothole. Or you could decide that you no longer wanted to react to that emotional pothole anger trigger and just let it go. So what? It's just a pothole, big deal. Choices....

Some choices are more painful than others. When our head struggles with our heart, and when the head wins and the heart loses it creates even more pain. But the choice is still your's.  Consider taking a deep breath before reacting to an emotional trigger person, your mother-in-law or perhaps the noisy neighbor, then remember that you don't have to react with anger, that it is your choice. The ego is reactionary and wants revenge, but at what cost? Tit for tat, of course. The higher self will say "forget about it, it's unimportant, let it go, forgive." That's a more freeing choice.

on the cusp

Sunday a week ago it was around 36^oF or so, the sun was shining brightly, the sky was blue, and the ground was wet from all the melting snow.   People were standing around chatting and lingering on the local supermarket parking lot to savor that first glimpse of spring, that first warmth in the air, feeling the need to squint and smile at the same time, not wanting to get back into their cars. This in-between time makes everyone so full of hope that spring is finally piercing through that coldest of winters, that it will finally arrive. Then the week became cold, that Sunday a distant memory, more snow, more cold, tomorrow perhaps temperatures in the 40s, and more snow and sleet. Yet, yesterday I heard birds chirping. They know.

We are literally sitting on the cusp of spring, at the stage where the yin in the yang turns to the yang in the ying, the switchover point where you know that winter is pretty much past us, yet is lingering, and a late winter snowstorm is not impossible. It is a pregnant time, full of possibilities, ready to burst.

gut feelings and hunches

Quite frequently I know who is calling as soon as the phone rings - and I am not cheating and looking at the caller ID.  I am sure you have experienced a "hunch" or a "gut feeling" about something, maybe you have seen ghosts, or not. Maybe you trust what you have experienced and do something with that information, but more often than not you probably ignore it and let it pass by because it doesn't seem real.   Since these experiences are invisible - you can't see that hunch, you can't grab that ghost - and we have become so visual to the exclusion of our senses beyond the 5th, we don't attach much importance to these experiences. Since the Age of Enlightenment (ahem..) our culture has discounted the senses that pick up this type of information (clairvoyance, clairaudience, clairsentience). Moreover, our culture has become increasingly fast, which makes it impossible to pick this stuff up without slowing down, being quiet and listening inward. Just like animal tracks in the snow make raccoon, deer and cat wanderings through our property visible and real in the winter, while we can only gather their presence with the help of clues at other times of the year (shaved bark, droppings), we can make this kind of ethereal information real and trustworthy through training our senses.

Hunches come to everyone differently, through your inner ear or eye or thought. Take notice next time whether it comes to you as a thought passing through,  whether you hear an inner voice, or perhaps see a picture of the caller popping up in your head. Simply pay attention and acknowledge next time this happens. Confirm that the information you get is correct and acknowledge that as well. This strengthens your trust in picking this type of communication up so you can actually make use of it. My daughter and I recently took a class in animal communication - animals communicate telepathically- and learned to tune into our cats and strengthen our ability to listen to, pick up and get information to and from them. Our instructor explained that it is like learning a new language and requires practice practice practice.  Just like when you decide to learn Russian or French, it doesn't happen overnight.  Of course it seems a bit unreal at first because the cat sits there in silence without facial expressions for us to go by while something is evidently going on in its mind, and we have to go deep and inward to pick it up.

Next time the phone rings, why not try to guess who is calling?

act of random kindness

A few days ago I had to take my car back to the auto body shop to fix a small chip-off I had previously overlooked when they repaired some deer damage. When I came to pick up the car and pulled out my wallet they said "no charge." I was floored. I had never before experienced an act of random kindness (although this wasn't entirely random) and was so surprised and grateful. It was amazing how this little event lifted and improved my mood for the rest of the day.  Don't underestimate the enormous influence, good and bad, you have on all the people you encounter during the day.  Your attitude reverberates out and out because it not only infects the people you have direct contact with, but also influences those next down the line and on and on.  Imagine how much good a smile, a kind word, a helping hand or a word of encouragement can do.

how do you see things?

"We do not see things the way they are, we see things the way we are." It's a quote of potentially old and unknown origin, but has most often been attributed to the writer Anaïs Nin. What is it supposed to mean? When we were young we all had those fears of dark basements, creatures lingering under our beds at night, or perhaps were afraid to bring the trash out after dark. We saw the world from our imaginary kid perspective, full of unknowns, of lurking dangers, of mystical creatures. When we became older those fears dissolved as a result of new knowledge, and we began to see the world from a different and new perspective, a more rational adult perspective.

Neither perspective is more real or less real, each is just one of many ways to see and experience the world. Imagine how a cat or a bee might experience this same exact world we all live in. An Australian aborigine sees and experiences the world from his particular traditions and symbiotic connection with nature. It's as if the world wrapped itself around our particular beliefs and perspectives, and mirrored back to us what we put out and who we are. You've probably heard something like "money begets money," or "the more love you give, the more love you get."  You see and get more of what you keep putting out.

When you believe in the beauty of the world and the beauty of people your world will be beautiful. If you believe in abundance you will have plentiful.   You see things the way you are.  Take a look around and notice what you see.

less (food) waste

We are not always aware of the abundance we live in, and grateful and thankful for it. As a result we create a lot of waste, personally and as a culture. This is the first of several blog posts on becoming more aware of the abundance that surrounds us and at the same time reducing waste in different area of our lives. Why waste reduction? When we respect something, when we are truly appreciative of it, then we handle it with a certain reverence and wouldn't carelessly throw it away. That goes for food as it does for other things in life. Sometimes one of my kids will come home and put their school sandwich back in the fridge. Now what? I have repackaged them the next day but often end up eating them myself so they don't go to waste. When my son was much much younger he threw out a perfectly good (wrapped) sandwich he did not care for. I was so incensed that I made him take it out and eat it - he still talks about it.

With a bit more reverence for all the food we have (just today it struck me at the supermarket how much food we have access to so easily, what abundance!) let's try to reduce food waste, the first of the wastes I will be addressing. One rule is to be a good leftover processor - eat them, freeze them, or cook them up with something new, but don't let them go bad. I save leftover bread pieces in the freezer until I have enough to make a sweet or savory breakfast strata. My mom makes a "tapas" meal every so often with all the little frozen leftover dishes. If you do buy produce in bulk, like I do, process those vegetables you can't eat right away by blanching and freezing them as meal building blocks for later use, or cooking them up in a soup or stew to be frozen. If food does go bad in your fridge reduce how much you buy or space your supermarket trips further apart. And how about going through your fridge once a week and either making a meal from all the leftovers right then or freezing what you can't use immediately?

We have so much, let's be grateful for it.

slow that train down

I used to rush around quite a bit during the pre-Christmas season, trying to accomplish my regular work work load and then fit all the other things in between, before and after - and ended up breathless and with misgivings and guilt about the lack of Christmas spirit - and Christmas cookies. This Christmas season is different. As a matter-of-fact, I put my whole book writing project on hold until after the holidays because - where am I rushing to anyhow?   As Lewis Carroll's Alice said somewhere "the hurrier I go, the behinder I get." I love that quote. When my mind isn't into something and I'd rather do something else, or feel guilty about not doing what I really want to be doing, then I am not doing any one of them justice.

So yesterday I stopped my work work earlier than usual and decided to bake Christmas cookies with my daughter - one of my favorite German Christmas cookie recipes: dark chocolate covered hazelnut shortbread or Haselnußgebäck. Sure, I got less work work done (although even that is relative - measured against what?), but I felt more in tune with the true holiday spirit and myself. When I surface skim and rush and get one more thing done I may indeed cross another thing off that never ending to-do list. But that list is truly endless. More will inevitably be added to it tomorrow and the day after. That's the way it goes. So I had to slow that train down to something like "the more leisurely I go, the deeper I live."

And when I do decide to do work work I light a candle and put on some Christmas carols.  

giving within your means

When I was (really) little my dad took me to a store just before Christmas and we bought a thimble as a Christmas present from me to my mom. And my mom took me to a store to buy with me a tiny leather coin purse in the shape of a mouse for me to give to my dad for Christmas. It was a lesson on giving within your means that has lasted until today. As a newly married many years later I was quite upset when my husband and I were coerced by his siblings to contribute to a new dishwasher for his mother, which was not within our means at the time and we had to scrape the money together. He comes from a family that believes in the direct relationship between the amount of money spent on a present and how much you love someone. I remember him telling me of selling his skates as a youngster to buy a present for Mother's Day, which still makes me sad.

I believe that it is the thought that counts. We all go through times where we have to watch what we spend. Nevertheless, it feels good to give and we want to express our love and appreciation. As a teenager I always made my own presents, needlework, crocheted items, sewn items. I love receiving homemade food items.   Whether it's a jar of honey from your own hives, homemade bread, sausage, mustard, herb infused oil or vinegar, cookies - I so appreciate such a present. I like crafted items, too - a pillow, napkins, a table runner. When my children were little and went to a small Waldorf kindergarten they made candles with applied wax motifs - beautiful. My 14-year old daughter is learning to sew and has made aprons, pyjama pants, tote bags, and much much more - all terrific low cost gifts with a personal touch. I used to receive coupon booklets from my children, such as for sharpening knives, emptying the dishwasher, or folding the laundry, all tedious jobs to me.  How about coupons for grown-ups for babysitting, cooking a meal, or running errands?

Lastly, the packaging can really make your gift shine and sparkle and makes it special. You can do so much with colorful tissue paper in a few colors, some sparkle, and some pretty fabric ribbon (I stock up whenever it's on sale at a crafts store). I have even wrapped presents in newspaper, which can look really cool, and I always recycle pretty ribbons and gift bags if they are in good condition.

clutter outside - clutter inside?

Clutter and mess, or not?  Clutter and mess promote creativity, they say, while neatness and tidiness are associated with conventionalism.   Yet, according to feng shui principles clutter and mess keep stale and stagnant energy around, whereas uncluttering and tidying up let fresh energy stream in and open up new possibilities.

The basement in our old house was definitely not a creative space any longer. It was stuffed to the ceiling with stuff, so much stuff that we ended up with duplicates and triplicates of tools and stuff because we couldn't find our stuff. We got rid of a lot of stuff when we moved. And as soon as we were in the new house my husband meticulously and methodically organized the carefully selected leftovers  with shelving units and hanging organizers. Now it feels really good to walk into the basement and actually find what you are looking for instead of rummaging around and walking back up in frustration because you couldn't find those pliers or screws you knew you had somewhere.

I always wonder about the connection between clutter in your mind and clutter in your home or office.   Clutter also has to do with a fear of letting go - you never know when you might need that stuff.  And feng shui has a lot to say about clutter and where you have it.  I find cleaning up and uncluttering quite liberating because you can literally see clearly again.

Messiness, while in the act of creating something specific, has definitely its creative purpose. But some organization in your everyday life is not only useful but downright refreshing and even necessary (there - that fresh chi energy).   Can't find that spice you wanted to use in your rub, can't find that black sweater that goes with those green pants, can't find that book you were just talking about with your friend? Time to make room, clear out, unclutter, organize, and get that fresh chi moving. I am convinced it clears your mind, too.